292: The Sweet Smell of Peppermint

Recorded on November 29th and releasing it December 11th. We ask some very important and disturbing questions about Santa. Answer as you will. Just be assured Victoria is trying to ruin the Winter holidays for everyone.

Victoria returns from Londontown and Daniel regails us with tales from his two weeks alone…or was he? Well there was all day beer runs and all night meat. Not as dirty as it sounds but one of those was protested by PETA. Props to San Diego Bottle Share and S&M Sausage & Meat! All that and I came out of the two weeks addicted…to…Skyrim. Yes. Skyrim.

We drink pumpkin ales and talk Thanksgiving. Daniel has what hopes to be his only bad trip to San Francisco and seriously, that Peppermint tho.

291: Glitter & Emetophilia

Hey if you think releasing an episode 2 weeks after recording was bad, try a full month. We truly hope that we still have listeners. In fact, let’s do that right now. If you still listen to the show, go to facebook.com/uncast OR email uncast.net@gmail.com and let us know. New meme, more people listen to Uncast than have died in America from Ebola.

Victoria goes through some ideas for Unniversary. It’ll be March 21, 2015. Plan accordingly. No excuses! Unless that excuse is “I don’t listen and I want no part of you and your hoodrat bullshit.” If it’s the latter, we understand. You’re dead to us anyways.

First order of business for Unniversary: bring the most derelict and the most awesome “American” treat you can think of and Andrea will have to try it during Unniversary. Best and worst snack will win a prize of some sort. It’ll be better than an Uncast shirt or a bag of condoms. Unless you’re into that sort of thing. Of course this also starts a conversation about various treats we loved as kids; both American and Mexican. Tamarind, chili, and sugar is awesome.

We went to Tony & Kristen’s wedding and we had an amazing time. My cousins came out to enjoy some beer for a day and after four breweries. Again, a great time was had by all. Shout out to Indian Joe Brewing and Karl Strauss. Also, Lost Abbey Brewing and Belching Beaver Brewing.

Victoria reads us a story about a threeway gone wrong. Not saying what happened but Meat Gin is a thing now. Read that as many times as needed to let it sink in. In the meantime, let’s discuss some Facebook bullshit. Yeah it really could be anything but it’s this shit. Somehow this reminds Vivi of the London Beer Flood.

Glitter is a horrible thing but now you can get pills that make you poop glitter. Victoria wants to shoot glitter into space. Somehow this ties into a semi truck with a naked woman riding in it, that hits a school bus. Guess that state. It did lead to Fitness Swingers. Don’t ask how. Just look it up. Or don’t.

Sportsing! The World Series has been determined but we recorded this when the NLCS had just ended. It was a fairy tale series of Royals vs Giants and in the end, the Marlins won? They’re owned by Jeffrey Loria so they’ll never win. Jeter > Mantle > Olbermann. We just needed to make that clear. Tired of Gawker bullying, Buzzfeed plagiarism, and Deadspin mansplaining? Go to the ClickHole!

Also May 2015 is coming up. Everyone find the best pair of shiny pants for MrDahonay’s next birthday! Speaking of my brofriend, we have beers this week. Also related, in China, a woman’s virginity is worth $5000. WTF people. Also WTF, don’t turn foods I like into dessert. No cappuccino chips. No hot dog flavored snacks. No mac n cheese ice cream. We don’t need no Bertie Bott’s Every Flavored Chip Bowl at Unniversary. Or do we?

290: Princess Cupcake Sparkles of Death

Yet again, an episode is released 2 weeks after it’s recorded. We start the show right off with tricksy Victoria who transitions from “Thanks Obama” to a black burger in Japan. This leads to an ebola mention and a discussion about 9/11. We’re not supposed to forget what happened in September 2011 but we did and we’re sorry. Either way, don’t use your brand to post about 9/11. We’re looking at you, Twix. It’s even too soon to make Arizona under water jokes on December 7th.

Speaking of terrorists, Victoria is not sure why the world is at war with Archer. They’re just trying to sell some cocaine. Give them some funding, they’ll be fine. Scotland. That’s a thing that happened. We discuss this before the vote and agree that Scotland needs to stay in the UK until they get their shit together.

BBQ weekend (aka Labor Day Weekend) was sweet! We played games, spent time with family, had some great food, some beer, and it was loads of fun. Victoria has a new hairdo and it looks awesome on her! To celebrate, let’s have some dirty gay porn! Send yours to uncast.net@gmail.com or simply read it to her at 619-940-4SEX!

We get into booktalk starting with VWars which Daniel liked but didn’t love. He’s also reading Raymond E. Feist’s “Magician” and Joe Abercrombie’s “The Blade Itself.” Victoria is getting into Haruki Murakami and started with “Norwegian Wood” which she loved. She also read “The Knife of Never Letting Go” by Patrick Ness. It’s harsh and intense for a book aimed at young teens. She loves “We Were Liars” by E. Lockhart. We won’t talk about it. Just read it. She also read “The Alchemist” which no one should read (which is why we don’t link to it). It’s a parable about a kid and living your dreams but it’s too unrealistic for those who didn’t grow up in a financially affluent situation.

The rest of the episode is crazy articles time! Links are below:
Two men arrested at same-sex marriage in Egypt, “test negative” for homosexuality. There’s a test for that now?
T
he Latest Weapon In The Fight Against Antibiotic Resistance Lives In The Vagina
Dominatrix speaking at Canadian Senate committee threatens to out politicians who use sex services if new backwards arse Conservative prostitution bill goes through.
Blundering IT worker who put his porn stash on city centre big screen is jailed
San Diego Unified School district now has a military vehicle to deal with truancies and miscreants

289: Filling All Your Churros
“It’s okay to take advantage of a sleeping churro!”

Recorded August 23rd and released today. We briefly mention Ferguson and we discuss the passing of Robin Williams. THAT is how long it’s been. We apologize. Also, since we’re releasing this during National Suicide Prevention Week, so I must put this here. 1-800-273-8255. If life ever becomes too much, give that number a call. We also discuss the ALS Ice Bucket Challenge and the good that it has done while it was viral. We look forward to seeing similar viral campaigns to bring awareness to health issues that could also use a bit more understanding from the general public and funding for research and support.

Let’s get to the fun shit! We enjoyed our 15th Wedding Anniversary last month. It was an epic night of Eclipse Chocolate for dinner (eat dessert first!) followed by Stone beer and Brabant for cocktails. Victoria also discovers a major secret that Andrea has been keeping from her. Stephen Fry classes up sucking one’s own cock. On the same note, Norwich City beat Ipswich Town to win the first leg of the East Anglia derby. We discuss absinthe and something that brings up why Sarah McLachlan is music’s Michael Vick. This may be due to Victoria being on the 4th beer in the day and she starts interrupting with random tunes.

Victoria got a new haircut. We went to BNS Brewery. Also known as Klan State Brewniversity. They don’t call 9-1-1. So, don’t have a heart attack or choke. They will shoot you. We did go to Urbn St Brewing though and they have our favorite pizza in San Diego county BY FAR. Their IPA is also one of the best in a county known for an over-abundance.

We got a Lootcrate that included a Funko GROOT doll. We took the in-laws to Puesto and Daniel got himself a very fine hat. We also found Kitson, which – Like Babette Schwartz – is one of those stores where you see a million things you want but nothing you truly NEED. Flame eater talks too much. Victoria wants to start a new version of Cards Against Humanity because our regular set, even with 4 expansions, is starting to get old. So she’s created a new way to play.

288: My Girlfriend, The Internet

Daniel is joined this week by satan and a shark. Lots to go over, since we hadn’t recorded in a while. This includes Comic-Con, Pride Parade, and stupid Facebook games. Oh and beer. We never forget the beer.

Andrea is enjoying our beautiful country. Entry was especially pleasurable. There were movies, concerts, food, beer, and nerds. Daniel ashamedly gets Mario Batalli restaurants confused with Guy Fieri restaurants. We discuss Victoria’s ‘thing’ for wanting to either fuck or marry foods.

Sierra Nevada’s Beer Camp was epic fun and Daniel cements his place as the God of San Diego for the weekend. We jump into Comic-Con International week and more epic was in store from HopCon to Wootstock and Sherlocked to the Thrilling Adventure Hour. We even stopped over to meet a famous author and get a book signed or something.

Facebook is pissing us all off. First, there’s this year’s breast cancer awareness game. Then there’s stupid quizzes. Then it’s all up in my business. Let’s get out our rage on some movies. Introducing, Snowpiercer. Hey look! It’s a movie whose porn parody doesn’t need to change names. Then they saw Hercules. We found our porn title. Hercules: Snow Piercer.

287: Nerds and Beer

We start right off with Victoria’s obsession with gay sex. Comic-Con is upon us and we have a great blog post for staying safe there or at any ‘con. Because we recorded this prior to Comic-Con, we discuss our plans for the week. We enjoy some beers of the week before talking sports for a moment. Daniel traded a monitor for jalapenos. Insert bad sports team jokes here.

We talk about  the Ketchup Mustard Crack Girl. One of us thinks it’s funny. The other is appalled. Which are you? Daniel was also guest hosted a great podcast “Chronic Chronicles” as a caregiving expert, and we both prepare for an Italian invasion as Andrea visits us again. This is exactly one hour long.

286: Muricka and Blergum

We recorded this on the Fourth of July. ‘Mericka! Fuhyah! #Fail #Unblessed. Did you back Reading Rainbow? We did! Over $5 million is awesome. We’re excited that it’ll be coming back. We talk about books for a bit. We get into July 4th and Daniel likens U.S. involvement in both world wars (WWI and WWII) to opening a jar. Victoria thinks Omaha Beach would’ve been a perfect spot for a romantic picnic. #Crazy. What filter would you use? #Instagram. We have no filters for our mouths.

We had birthdays! #GettinOld They were filled with maple bacon donuts, beer, Waves, Five Guys, Double IPAs, cocktails, pool parties, more beer, and The Perch.#Awesome Congrats, MrDaH! #Impressed As if he needed such a thing, Fleshlight has found a way for you to fuck your porn. They call it: The Launch Pad. #Creepy This breaks out into a discussion on various sex toys and penis size. #Judgment

We had a great trip to Arizona. #HotAsHell Even the trips there and back were a blast. #MoreHeatPuns We had a taste of Andrew’s beer before he released it officially as Perch Brewery beer. We met some awesome new people and had a great night of food and cocktails to celebrate Victoria’s birthday. The other high point was drinking Perch beer while playing Rock Band. The low point was having to listen to/watch Sex & The City while I tried to watch the USA vs Portugal World Cup match on the laptop. #CantLiveWithoutEm

There’s a new fitness tracker that’s “Fitbit for your vagina.” #ThatsHawt Introducing, the KGoal. Victoria is enamored and wants to prove herself. Donations can be made by clicking the button at Uncast.net. You have 30 days. Moving on to possible birthday celebration events for her dad, it’s come down to two horse-mask choices: NHL hockey game or strip club? #NOPE

As we discuss a story of a drunk man letting his dog drive him to the store for corn, Victoria becomes increasingly drunk with alarming speed. #BeerSex We discuss USA’s run in the World Cup and how maybe we should have brought Landon Donovan. We could’ve maybe used someone who can score. End result, Americans actually give a shit about soccer. Those who don’t, are wrong.

Victoria wants you to tell her your favorite summer movie. We discuss other movies and Guardians of the Galaxy. It fades from there.

 

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