291: Glitter & Emetophilia

Hey if you think releasing an episode 2 weeks after recording was bad, try a full month. We truly hope that we still have listeners. In fact, let’s do that right now. If you still listen to the show, go to facebook.com/uncast OR email uncast.net@gmail.com and let us know. New meme, more people listen to Uncast than have died in America from Ebola.

Victoria goes through some ideas for Unniversary. It’ll be March 21, 2015. Plan accordingly. No excuses! Unless that excuse is “I don’t listen and I want no part of you and your hoodrat bullshit.” If it’s the latter, we understand. You’re dead to us anyways.

First order of business for Unniversary: bring the most derelict and the most awesome “American” treat you can think of and Andrea will have to try it during Unniversary. Best and worst snack will win a prize of some sort. It’ll be better than an Uncast shirt or a bag of condoms. Unless you’re into that sort of thing. Of course this also starts a conversation about various treats we loved as kids; both American and Mexican. Tamarind, chili, and sugar is awesome.

We went to Tony & Kristen’s wedding and we had an amazing time. My cousins came out to enjoy some beer for a day and after four breweries. Again, a great time was had by all. Shout out to Indian Joe Brewing and Karl Strauss. Also, Lost Abbey Brewing and Belching Beaver Brewing.

Victoria reads us a story about a threeway gone wrong. Not saying what happened but Meat Gin is a thing now. Read that as many times as needed to let it sink in. In the meantime, let’s discuss some Facebook bullshit. Yeah it really could be anything but it’s this shit. Somehow this reminds Vivi of the London Beer Flood.

Glitter is a horrible thing but now you can get pills that make you poop glitter. Victoria wants to shoot glitter into space. Somehow this ties into a semi truck with a naked woman riding in it, that hits a school bus. Guess that state. It did lead to Fitness Swingers. Don’t ask how. Just look it up. Or don’t.

Sportsing! The World Series has been determined but we recorded this when the NLCS had just ended. It was a fairy tale series of Royals vs Giants and in the end, the Marlins won? They’re owned by Jeffrey Loria so they’ll never win. Jeter > Mantle > Olbermann. We just needed to make that clear. Tired of Gawker bullying, Buzzfeed plagiarism, and Deadspin mansplaining? Go to the ClickHole!

Also May 2015 is coming up. Everyone find the best pair of shiny pants for MrDahonay’s next birthday! Speaking of my brofriend, we have beers this week. Also related, in China, a woman’s virginity is worth $5000. WTF people. Also WTF, don’t turn foods I like into dessert. No cappuccino chips. No hot dog flavored snacks. No mac n cheese ice cream. We don’t need no Bertie Bott’s Every Flavored Chip Bowl at Unniversary. Or do we?

243: The Four My Little Ponies of The Apocalypse

This week we miss Rhian for many reasons. She’s left the Casa and she had to miss recording this episode with us as she’s dealing with some pretty serious stuff at the moment. We hope to have her back on the show as soon as possible. In the meantime, you get us, mwahahaha! We start right off as you’d expect, at the beginning. No seriously, we talk about the apocalypse. Do zombies have to be involved? You decide. Beer of the week is taken Wookey style. We drank of it and tasted that it was pretty hoppily awesome!

We discuss our recent Ottawa trip, returning Rhian to her home country and enjoying the city’s wonders. Victoria gives us an Awesome List and then it gets ugly. Jason Statham ugly. Victoria reviews “The Italian Job” and talks a bit about a couple other movies or something. I get into the Euro 2012 soccer tournament and yes I’m bitter about the outcome. Whatever. There’s a bit of hipster hate and we clear up the myth that I think Arcade Fire and Nickelback are in any way comparible. We end the show with a new game that (as usual) Vivi loves and I do not.

241: I Put A Whistle On My Vagina

Rhian apologizes for her voice and Victoria apologizes for nothing in this episode. We discuss a juice cleanse found in Oprah’s magazine and diarhettic comas. We talk about Rhian’s recent stay in the hospital, transfusion number two and Rhian 3.0 is born. For the story on that, visit her blog at Rhiloaded.com.

Victoria lays down some ultimatums and “it’s either this or this but it has to be one of the two or both” type shit on Daniel. Yet again she demands a phallus to poke a donut. The God provides when the mortals prove they’re deserving of those things they seek. Rhian invents a transformer that’s both eyeglasses and a vibrator. Finally we drop into the beer of the week. Another Californian invention worth drinking. This time Drake’s Drakonic Imperial Stout.

We then go into Hunger Games talk and Victoria decides the tribute character she’d be if she was in the story. She also brings us the 13 worst things to do with your vagina. I have to question her decision making skills this episode. Game of Thrones comes up again and Vivi reveals her need to have a torrid affair with Tyrion Lannister. Now I’m SURE she has poor decision making skills this episode.

Rhian and Daniel talk about local San Diego food and one specific block of places in particular that we need to try. There’s a brief discussion of 50 Shades of Grey before Rhian saves the show with Whore News. This week: the recent trend of briefly replacing the news with porn.

Butch joins us this week, so naturally the show starts out with talk of golden showers and men he’d go gay for. We discuss a Deathcab for Cutie concert, what Vivi would do to see Florence + The Machine and why Rhi hates The Postal Service. We try our first sampling from Iron Fist Brewing and love it.

There’s all sorts of food talk from the horrors of Denny’s new cheese menu to the amazing food and drinks at Agave Grill in Ottawa. We introduce our Bear Of The Week when Victoria goes on a rampage about a certain internet meme poster. This leads to talks of teddy bear picnics, bears in the gay community and finally Butch’s latest business idea.

Uncast is trying to plan out an Armageddon party at the end of 2012. It will be full of drinking, debauchery and putting Viagra buckets on people’s heads. We learn there are a lot of things Victoria doesn’t know. She doesn’t know the Spanish word for cheese nor does she know the correct song that was #1 the week we were born. BTW, that would be “Shadow Dancer” by Andy Gibb, NOT “Stayin’ Alive” by The Bee Gees. Close but no queso.

We learn once again that Rhian is a REAL witch and not just some fake movie version. Victoria states that she wants to be committed and then she promptly leaves the show. Rhian brings us a Canadian article and plugs a philanthropic dance group run by a dear friend of hers. Check out Lanie Dance, people. It’s for the best. Remember, Rhi’s witchy. She also brings us some Whore News.

Lastly, we have a NEW CONTEST!! If Victoria can have apple pie and Rhian has her lily bits, then wtf are we to call Daniel’s magic penis? YOU CAN DECIDE!!
That’s right. Send in all your submissions for possible names either by leaving comments on uncast.net or by emailing us at uncast.net@gmail.com. You have until November 19th to submit. The hosts will then narrow down the names to a tiny group of finalists. YOU will vote on the final winner, to be announced on the first episode with Rhi back live at the Casa. Tat gives all of you until the clock strikes 2012 to submit the final votes. Whoever has come up with the winning name, will win a nice large boxed prize (No it’d be funny but it’s not what you’re thinking). We’re thinking other finalists may also possibly win a little sumpin’ sumpin’.

We start right off with beer, as we are oft to do. Victoria and I celebrate a dozen years of marriage and share our weekend together with you. After a bit of Smurf Porn and Sims3 discussion (unrelated?), we go through a story about a plot during WWII to turn Hitler into a woman. Victoria reviews Glee 3D and mentions how distressing it is that her eyes are broken.

We jump from Glee to nostalgia as we talk about various childhood toys, shows, etc. This leads Daniel into an article listing some truly stupid ways schools are trying to keep schools safe. We share some stories from our own childhoods. Victoria talks about Pottermore and Rhian brings us the latest in Whore News. We have been getting obsessed with police/fire scanners lately and we hope to soon release a special episode with just a few moments from one night listening to scanners. An hour, 55 minutes and 31 seconds of awesomesauce.

Rachel’s last appearance as an In-Casa guest on the show before returning home. we down the easily drinkable beer of the week and learn Canada’s Mountain Dew has no caffeine! Meanwhile in America, you can get drugs through the drive-thru. We ponder whether that includes cocaine, while transitioning seamlessly to new tattoo days for Rachel and Vivi.

Daniel talks about coming down with a bit of food poisoning or maybe just a stomach virus but Victoria promptly makes fun of him about it. Seriously though, I had no better nurses this week than the three women on this episode.To transition nicely, Rhian asks wtf is up with hillbilly handfishing? This brings us to the discussion of fishing which naturally goes into the question of what exactly it is Atheists really believe or not or whatever.

Victoria, Rachel and Daniel watched the last installment of the Harry Potter movie series. In fact, the girls saw it three times in two weeks and there’s been a month straight of HP obsession in the house. Rhian tries to justify Canada’s Civic Holiday. There’s nothing more to it than that. It’s just a government issued reason for everyone to have the day off. We go through a list of holidays we need to add to the list. This includes our birthdays and a stronger support for Victoria Day in America.

Apparently Russia has just now considered beer an alcoholic beverage. Ottawa celebrates Tom Green Day and Rhian shares some stories of his college days, since they were in the same university and department at about the same time. She mentions he was a douchebag back then and also brings back how Alanis Morrisette was the same back in her school days. Rhian brings us some whore news! This one is a Facebook page against Stupid Whores. Apparently it’s a group that just hates girls that are into superficial stuff.

Push our Friends!
Trainwreck in Sarasota
Whatthejules.com
AmHam Show
I Love Lard
DJ Brother Darkness
makingangelscry.blogspot.com
TIltedhalocast.com

Rachel’s back for another week and we start right off with Dork Korner. This is our little turn at hitting the switch on the Wayback Machine and seeing who has some of the dorkiest likes or memories. Yeah I just said Wayback Machine. Did I mention it was Dork Korner? OK now you get it. We’re deeply disappointed in a recent Air Canada Lawsuitwhich brings on plenty of language related discussion.We also go into Canada’s very careful preparations for commemorating the 200th anniversary of the War of 1812 and the role it played. If you don’t know, just ask any Canadian. They’ll gladly tell you just who it was that burned down the White House. Oh but we’re still friends so it’s all good. Victoria proposes a way to get back at GOP’s use of “Obama Care” as a negative phrase.

We discuss our morning at the Birch Aquarium, followed by lunch at Sammys Woodfired Pizza. Is it wrong to spend all morning looking at fish and then eat salmon for lunch? Photos from this adventure can be found here. No, just click the word HERE. WOW I feel like I’m back at work. OK, moving on. We discuss the new Google+, Rhian’s busy week and the now VERY distantly past MLB All-Star Game. Yeah, that’s right. I totally missed discussing it when it was relevant.

Daniel brings up a new way to make gelatin…out of HUMANS! Really, were you THAT surprised? Rhian brings us some more Whore News, this time about tips and pointers about bromances. Daniel tries to go into a story about a boner-inducing spider that rampaged a supermarket but the girls would not allow it. So he’s putting the link here.