318: 2016 Learns Foreplay

Dear 2016, thanks for the offer. We’re flattered. We really am but no. We won’t have intercourse with you. Why? Simple: you never learned foreplay. You had one job 2016. One. Anyways we’re back and we’re tackling the myth that 2016 was the worst year on record by pointing out some of the awesomeness that came with the year whether it was trips we took, time together or with other loved ones, karaoke to real musical performances, beer as always plays a role and we have so much more to look forward to in 2017…like U-X: Decade of Debauchery!

290: Princess Cupcake Sparkles of Death

Yet again, an episode is released 2 weeks after it’s recorded. We start the show right off with tricksy Victoria who transitions from “Thanks Obama” to a black burger in Japan. This leads to an ebola mention and a discussion about 9/11. We’re not supposed to forget what happened in September 2011 but we did and we’re sorry. Either way, don’t use your brand to post about 9/11. We’re looking at you, Twix. It’s even too soon to make Arizona under water jokes on December 7th.

Speaking of terrorists, Victoria is not sure why the world is at war with Archer. They’re just trying to sell some cocaine. Give them some funding, they’ll be fine. Scotland. That’s a thing that happened. We discuss this before the vote and agree that Scotland needs to stay in the UK until they get their shit together.

BBQ weekend (aka Labor Day Weekend) was sweet! We played games, spent time with family, had some great food, some beer, and it was loads of fun. Victoria has a new hairdo and it looks awesome on her! To celebrate, let’s have some dirty gay porn! Send yours to uncast.net@gmail.com or simply read it to her at 619-940-4SEX!

We get into booktalk starting with VWars which Daniel liked but didn’t love. He’s also reading Raymond E. Feist’s “Magician” and Joe Abercrombie’s “The Blade Itself.” Victoria is getting into Haruki Murakami and started with “Norwegian Wood” which she loved. She also read “The Knife of Never Letting Go” by Patrick Ness. It’s harsh and intense for a book aimed at young teens. She loves “We Were Liars” by E. Lockhart. We won’t talk about it. Just read it. She also read “The Alchemist” which no one should read (which is why we don’t link to it). It’s a parable about a kid and living your dreams but it’s too unrealistic for those who didn’t grow up in a financially affluent situation.

The rest of the episode is crazy articles time! Links are below:
Two men arrested at same-sex marriage in Egypt, “test negative” for homosexuality. There’s a test for that now?
T
he Latest Weapon In The Fight Against Antibiotic Resistance Lives In The Vagina
Dominatrix speaking at Canadian Senate committee threatens to out politicians who use sex services if new backwards arse Conservative prostitution bill goes through.
Blundering IT worker who put his porn stash on city centre big screen is jailed
San Diego Unified School district now has a military vehicle to deal with truancies and miscreants

286: Muricka and Blergum

We recorded this on the Fourth of July. ‘Mericka! Fuhyah! #Fail #Unblessed. Did you back Reading Rainbow? We did! Over $5 million is awesome. We’re excited that it’ll be coming back. We talk about books for a bit. We get into July 4th and Daniel likens U.S. involvement in both world wars (WWI and WWII) to opening a jar. Victoria thinks Omaha Beach would’ve been a perfect spot for a romantic picnic. #Crazy. What filter would you use? #Instagram. We have no filters for our mouths.

We had birthdays! #GettinOld They were filled with maple bacon donuts, beer, Waves, Five Guys, Double IPAs, cocktails, pool parties, more beer, and The Perch.#Awesome Congrats, MrDaH! #Impressed As if he needed such a thing, Fleshlight has found a way for you to fuck your porn. They call it: The Launch Pad. #Creepy This breaks out into a discussion on various sex toys and penis size. #Judgment

We had a great trip to Arizona. #HotAsHell Even the trips there and back were a blast. #MoreHeatPuns We had a taste of Andrew’s beer before he released it officially as Perch Brewery beer. We met some awesome new people and had a great night of food and cocktails to celebrate Victoria’s birthday. The other high point was drinking Perch beer while playing Rock Band. The low point was having to listen to/watch Sex & The City while I tried to watch the USA vs Portugal World Cup match on the laptop. #CantLiveWithoutEm

There’s a new fitness tracker that’s “Fitbit for your vagina.” #ThatsHawt Introducing, the KGoal. Victoria is enamored and wants to prove herself. Donations can be made by clicking the button at Uncast.net. You have 30 days. Moving on to possible birthday celebration events for her dad, it’s come down to two horse-mask choices: NHL hockey game or strip club? #NOPE

As we discuss a story of a drunk man letting his dog drive him to the store for corn, Victoria becomes increasingly drunk with alarming speed. #BeerSex We discuss USA’s run in the World Cup and how maybe we should have brought Landon Donovan. We could’ve maybe used someone who can score. End result, Americans actually give a shit about soccer. Those who don’t, are wrong.

Victoria wants you to tell her your favorite summer movie. We discuss other movies and Guardians of the Galaxy. It fades from there.

 

264: There Is Always Room For A High Five

The long awaited Home Brew episode of Uncast is here! We join Tony and The DaHonays (not a new 50’s rock group) at the Lands End Resort in Oceanside, CA. We go through TEN different home brews this evening and learn the basics of home brewing from Tony and Andrew. Learn how to get started brewing at home, adding various flavors into your beer and what goes into making a Sour Ale. There are a few awesome tales and awesome tail mixed in, including DaHonay’s amazing Firestone-Walker Jacket story. This episode is two and a half hours long but worth every minute. I reward you at the end with a new short remix of our theme song. Enjoy!

 

Beers of the Night:

Beer #1: DaH Brew Zombie Grains (Imperial IPA w/ Nelson Hops)

Beer #2: Sunspear Ale (Apricot Cinnamon Ale; 4.2% ABV)

Beer #3: The Dornishman’s Wife (Kolsh kissed with pomegranate)

Beer #4: Night of Flowers Growing Strong (Roses, Hibiscus flowers and heather tips with a deep dark twist)

Beer #5: Lannister Hibiscus Blonde Ale

Beer #6: House Arryn Suckling Milk Stout (infused with bourbon and cherries)

Beer #7: Kraken Ink (Hefty braggot – 21% ABV!)

Beer #8: DaH Brew Rosemary IPA

Beer #9: DaH Brew Ricky Bobby Ale (Pale Ale with popcorn)

Beer #10: DaH Brew Arizona Copper Ale

 

Recommended Reading:
Beer Craft: A Simple Guide To Making Great Beer” by William Bostwick

The Complete Joy of Homebrewing” by Charlie Papazian

Brew Your Own Magazine

 

Recommended Watching:

How Beer Saved The World (Documentary)

Recommended Listening:
List of various awesome podcasts on the DaH Brew Blog

As you may be able to tell from the title, watch the first step. This show’s a doozy. We start off with narcophilia before moving on to Victoria forcing her vagina to read. No not teaching, forcing. We discuss cartoons that aren’t just for kids, Daniel creates his yearly geeky twist on the NCAA Bracket. Let’s just say this year tops last year.

256: My Illiterate Vagina

We discover war dolphins that went AWOL for bottlenose poon, golden showers aren’t for us, keeping a whore journal, Victoria’s whacky teen bucket list, our game night with Becky and Victoria’s shower Bane. Yes, the Batman villain. We end with time travel and the stump amendment. Don’t question it. Just listen.

255: Zombie Dick

How Uncast Got It’s Swagger Back. Coronado Hoppy Daze helps and apparently so does the topic of this week’s show title. We discuss some preparations for the weekend of Rhian’s Grand Celebration of Life and of course Universary VI. Victoria has a few (and by that I mean a LOT) of Lord of the Ring questions. We discuss bad TV shows and good websites, including an upcoming one that includes us reviewing burgers and breweries. Should be fun! Speaking of fun, baseball is about to start as Spring Training is under way. Daniel is super excited and Vivi is sorta kinda (less than she claims) excited. Oh and there’s an Awesome List or something. Check it out and whatnot. Just over an hour of tasty fun…unlike zombie dick.

 

250a: Porn Church

We kinda lost the best episode in the world. Damn external hard drive. This is just a tribute. A two part tribute. We start off with two beers of the week and in the midst of this, we find the one topic that is taboo for Uncast. We also discuss a business idea Victoria has. Hint, it involves religion and food. We then move on to the main event of the evening. THREE Awesome Lists! Enjoy Part One. Part Two will be out in a couple days. Promise.