November 17, 2011

227: Waist Up Until I Tell You To Stand Up

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227: Waist Up Until I Tell You To Stand Up

We come at you from all sides this week. Victoria has issues with lyrics, The DaHonays bring us “Marinade” and we rate it, we talk a bit of history and politics and then comes the sad news of a couple recent deaths. RIP Heavy D & Joe Frazier. We discuss transporting Rhian’s cat from Ottawa to San Diego.

RHIAN IS GOING TO THE MAYO CLINIC!!! You’ve all heard her interview on episode 206 and this trip could be her last chance at real treatment that could make a real positive difference. We have set up a fundraiser to help cover the costs for her so PLEASE DONATE or share if you can’t donate: http://www.giveforward.com/jointherhiarmy and send a little love to Rhian by helping to pay for treatment that could really improve her quality of life.

Daniel brings a few articles championing San Diego’s “Craft Cocktail” scene. We’ve already beaten the rest of the world at craft beer, now watch us kick ass with hard liquors. Rhian brings to our attention the continued existence of telephone chat lines. Victoria has a new Game Show idea called “Snatch For Catch”. Surprisingly we transition that into the Duggar family and our rant on this bullshit. When is enough, enough? We also ask at what age or point is it inappropriate to have sex with your child in the room? This awkwardsly leads into Whore News where we learn that coal miners (NOT Minors) need love too. We wrap things up in 1 hr, 6 min, 53 sec.

 

November 7, 2011

226: You Can’t Squirt With An Audience

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226: You Can’t Squirt With An Audience

Due to an mp3 upload error on Daniel’s part, 226 is temporarily unavailable. This should be fixed by  11/8/2011, 7pm Pacific Time. Sorry folks!

We start right off on this Halloween episode with awesome spiced beer and a new bukkake superhero. We have to explain to our live audience what bukkake is. Victoria also has lots of questions for our audience. This of course blends into fisting and why guys are weirded out by super kinky sex acts. This leads to squirting and Daniel has questions for those female listeners who have. Victoria brings up Thai ladyboys and this naturally segues into a story about a Shapeshifting Hooker. We get another entry in the “Name Daniel’s Penis” contest. If it’s turned purple, let go of it, man!We are really touched and honored to share some critical acclaim from someone close to the show. Bias much? You bet! We’ll still take it cause it’s real! Go check out Junkenstein’s blog and his new podcast, “Junk’s Trunk” which is ‘like a musical essay’ and really great. Victoria shares an article about a man who firebombed a Taco Bell due to a meat shortage in his Chalupa. We learn that China is now Cracking Down On Overly Entertaining TV. Victoria shares her ultimate shameber song. Click it, damn you! We end the show with Whore News about a topless woman that leads cops on a 200 km/hr chase. Now THAT’S a fast whore. Speaking of fast. We get this out in an hour, four minutes and nine seconds.
 

October 26, 2011

224: Occupy Rhian

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Live again from vokle.com. You’ll need to get high before listening to this one. Victoria and Rhian both have a lot on their hands in dealing with Daniel. We learn the origin of the phrase “Laundry List”. Victoria introduces a new business idea and we’re all appalled. Or not.  Guest listeners mistake vokle.com for myfreecams.com and we have to let them down gently. This also includes their requests for various animal noises. These people really like some freaky shit.

Rhian brings us a list (you know how we love our lists) of the 10 Foods For A Better Sex Life. After getting bored with the list Victoria and Rhian start hitting on each other instead. In the process of this and learn that Rhian does not play with food for sex. Not into it. Stop trying. We learn all about lubes thanks to a recent episode of Doctor Oz.

We discuss this Occupy movement and wonder what the hell is this movement really about? Why now? Are we supposed to be the 99% or the 1%? What if I’m the 13%? Do they even know what this is really about or is it just an opportunity for us to bitch about everything we’re upset about or see as unfair in the ‘system’? Is this actually going to change anything or is it one more example of a lot of people bitching and yelling for a while and then going back to their lives with nothing being done?

We do know we love our listeners and special thanks to FuzBubbles for adding us on GetGlue. Thanks, love! Rhian brings us 14 Words With No English Equivalent and we have a blast trying to pronounce them. We ask all of you working in a service that requires the cleaning of public restrooms. Can you maybe go in and clean those a lot more often? Every hour for malls and stores with high volume, 2-3 times a day for restaurants or low-volume stores, etc? We jump from that right into whore news dealing with dogs and the newly crowned “Whore-o-ween”.

 

October 17, 2011

223: What Does Albino Smell Like?

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223: What Does Albino Smell Like?

This week is a blend of chaos and cray cray. Starting with this year’s version of Shipyard Smashed Pumpkin Ale, we discuss medieval shit, eggnog, hiring a personal show butcher, mernimals and add Fish Bottom as a band name. First article of the week is about Clitoral Stimulation. We talk about albinos (hence the show title) and Victoria pens a novel titled: “How To Fuck A Mermaid: And Other Tails”.

Canadians voted for their Provincial Premiers and we discuss Canadian politics a bit. We also discuss Canadian Thanksgiving and the fun that comes with that each year. We celebrated here in the United States a bit by making the same dish. Tourtieres (meat pies) are quite tasty. Going back to politics, we learn about a politician that strips during a recent commercial.

Victoria comes strong with an Awesome List from heaven and we all enjoy a taste of the awesome. Our very dear friend, Annam Manthiram has written a book titled “After The Tsunami” and we’re going to be seeing her at a reading next month. We’re really proud of her and we want to push her book as much as we can. We discuss things parents say that just don’t make any sense. Rhian brings us whore news and everything is alright. First we learn that it is okay to be a porn star and a high school teacher. We also hear about a woman that wanted a male stripper for her 100th birthday. I hope I’m still that horny at 100. Hell, I hope I reach 100. Maybe. All this in an hour, seven minutes, thirty-eight seconds.

 

October 8, 2011

222: Meatsicle

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222: Meatsicle

Our first live show at Vokle.com! we start off with our beer of the week and learn that Rhian is an angel and therefore was immaculately conceptualized. Yeah I used the wrong word on purpose. Victoria is not allowed around sharp instruments anymore after she nearly sheared the side of her finger tip off blindly reaching into the sink.

Daniel introduces a 12-step recovery from Juggalism program, thanks to Adult Swim. Daniel needs to learn games. Rhian says she knows Asshole and is really good at it. We’ll learn what she means by that later. Rhian has a crazy psycho dream and we all learn about her new band, Meatsicle. TLC’s “How Stuff Works” brings us the 10 Things Your Kid Should Not Be For Halloween and Daniel shares things he recently learned from podcasts.

Rhian brings an article about a Kansas man that accidentally stole six EMPTY xxx DVD cases. She also brings us two whore news stories: A couple enjoys sex on their balcony in Australia and on the other, organizers of a Swiss farming calendar got a lot of slack for including girls in bikinis.

 

October 6, 2011

221: Hipster Porno

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Victoria of the bitten boob, Rhian of the dry boob, Daniel says “It ain’t just my dick that heals!” This week we learn Rhian rides vacuums, you don’t bring a broom to a mop fight and don’t be a dick about not liking things. We check out Garfunkel & Oates live, Rhian has an MRI and a terrible fall and we spend a night tracking a falling satellite. There’s Superkid Nails, a couple movie reviews and we learn to use Grover as a verb. Victoria shares her strange obsesions and Daniel has to 9,000 up her. We ask for fan participation in this one. What are your thoughts on what it would be like to have the genitalia you lack? Rhian brings us articles on Guinea Pig Dating Services and Naked Protests in San Francisco. Anyone surprised at that last one? No? Me neither. It’s hecka sexy. So is this episode. All in an hour, 42 minutes, 50 seconds of hawtness.

 

September 21, 2011

220 – I Just Deflated The Sex Toy

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This week is classic Uncast. We start off trying to talk beer but get sidetracked by the Fallen Angels discussions on a new idea for IKEA (check the title). We finally get around to discussing the beer and it turns out to be worthy of nothing but…well, nothing. Our first article of the week is Cracked’s list of The 5 Things You Do Every Day That Are Actually Addictions.

We discuss new comedy shows we’ve seen, including the easy to hate yet hilarious Bo Burnham and the easy to love yet blended reviewed Wyatt Cenac. We discuss seals defending people, and the pros and cons of recent internet memes. There’s the stupidity of A Woman Asked To Remove Her Pot Shirt At A Willie Nelson Concert and then there’s dueling Whore News stories. First, there’s more Erotic Dancing On A Plane and then there’s a barmaid that has the local wives steaming mad. She looks like old wet leather that’s been ridden hard and beaten mercilessly. All this and more in an hour, a minute and forty some seconds.

 

September 15, 2011

219: Dough Face Palm

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We start the show right off with a selection from our new favorite brewery, Mazanita Brewery. Victoria wants everything that goes in her mouth to have a caramel center. We switch that to wanting pot butter in the middle of everything we eat or drink. We admit becoming too obsessed with Sims Social. This week we learn that Rhian doesn’t know who Ayn Rand is.Victoria’s article of the week is the 10 Insulting Words You Should Know. We review a couple of movies we recently watched: “The Town” and “The Adjustment Bureau”. Now we want dapper hats. We all brave through a disturbing new commercial for Luvs Diapers. Daniel brings 8 Essential Bacon Hacks and the 11 Most Unlikely Fetishesbecause he’s all about bacon and sex.Gumby tries to rob a local 7-11 and loses 27 cents out of the whole thing. Do you like fucking rafts? Well, Rhian brings the story for you. Apparently, it’s illegal in Ohio! Victoria brings an Awesome List and we end by talking more about our “Name Daniel’s Penis” contest. This show is 101 minutes of bescummin!!

WE WANT YOU!
Daniel’s penis needs a moniker fit to describe his magical manhood. So email, leave a comment at uncast.net, call 619-940-4SEX or leave the names on reply to one of us on Twitter or post it on Facebook. We’re taking entries until November 18th. Winner will get a large prize package including music and schwag from GuitarRob of Trainwreck In Sarasota fame.
 

September 7, 2011

218: A Most Unprofessional Podcast

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Butch joins us this week, so naturally the show starts out with talk of golden showers and men he’d go gay for. We discuss a Deathcab for Cutie concert, what Vivi would do to see Florence + The Machine and why Rhi hates The Postal Service. We try our first sampling from Iron Fist Brewing and love it.

There’s all sorts of food talk from the horrors of Denny’s new cheese menu to the amazing food and drinks at Agave Grill in Ottawa. We introduce our Bear Of The Week when Victoria goes on a rampage about a certain internet meme poster. This leads to talks of teddy bear picnics, bears in the gay community and finally Butch’s latest business idea.

Uncast is trying to plan out an Armageddon party at the end of 2012. It will be full of drinking, debauchery and putting Viagra buckets on people’s heads. We learn there are a lot of things Victoria doesn’t know. She doesn’t know the Spanish word for cheese nor does she know the correct song that was #1 the week we were born. BTW, that would be “Shadow Dancer” by Andy Gibb, NOT “Stayin’ Alive” by The Bee Gees. Close but no queso.

We learn once again that Rhian is a REAL witch and not just some fake movie version. Victoria states that she wants to be committed and then she promptly leaves the show. Rhian brings us a Canadian article and plugs a philanthropic dance group run by a dear friend of hers. Check out Lanie Dance, people. It’s for the best. Remember, Rhi’s witchy. She also brings us some Whore News.

Lastly, we have a NEW CONTEST!! If Victoria can have apple pie and Rhian has her lily bits, then wtf are we to call Daniel’s magic penis? YOU CAN DECIDE!!
That’s right. Send in all your submissions for possible names either by leaving comments on uncast.net or by emailing us at uncast.net@gmail.com. You have until November 19th to submit. The hosts will then narrow down the names to a tiny group of finalists. YOU will vote on the final winner, to be announced on the first episode with Rhi back live at the Casa. Tat gives all of you until the clock strikes 2012 to submit the final votes. Whoever has come up with the winning name, will win a nice large boxed prize (No it’d be funny but it’s not what you’re thinking). We’re thinking other finalists may also possibly win a little sumpin’ sumpin’.

 

August 31, 2011

217: The Difficult Brown

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We jump all over a couple of Manzanita beers and rave on both. Victoria gets talking about “The Wire” and phrases she can’t stop saying. There’s a cake hotel for all of us. We share some cool quotes from a Twitter buddy. We hear a story of a Japanese cock glued to a man’s hand and the Handerpants that made his life so much easier. We learn Sinead O’Connor is horny and loves anal. This leads to debate over hating artists simply because it’s cool to hate them and whether that’s truly fair or not.

Rhi brings us a hoax warning that there’s a panda on the rampage. Rhi rounds it out with some Whore News! We learn about slores and the slut gene! We’ve kept this one a bit shorter for you since last week’s ran so long. It’s only 45 minutes!

 

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