173: I’m No One’s Punchline

The last show we do with Rhian “in studio” for a while starts right off with comments from listeners and beer. We discuss a bit of an elevator incident where Daniel almost died. Victoria helps out by talking about two people from UCSD dying this week. We debate about whether or not “Counter Assault” is a proper name for bear spray. We learn that mace and apple pie are not a good mix.

We watched Princess Bride this week. Has anyone noticed how seriously stupid Buttercup is? Speaking of stupid, Victoria asks what has got to be the winner of the year for stupid questions. We move on from that quickly and go to the 20 Things You’re Never Too Old For. Rhian brings us some Whore News from The Examiner. We learn that people die in threes so that God can have an “arrival at Heaven’s Gate” joke. Rhian brings an Awesome List! It’s 40% longer than normal but it’s all good. She pimps out Les Ballets de Trockadero de Monte Carlo and Cirque du Soleil’s KOOZA. PLEASE go check them out! Both troupes are awesome! Victoria follows this up with hate mail about Pluto from ten years ago and we end with Hipsters issue filling out the Census. You know it’s because they can’t read, right? This one’s just over 45 minutes so it’s well within commuting time. Enjoy!

So with that, check out Jim and Rhian on Audiobuzzed! They’ve got a bit of a contest going, so listen to their latest epiosde and call in to place your vote for who’s going to win!

171: We Do When The Doing Needs Done

We’re all over the place this week. Coming off of the latest episode of Lost (as of this recording), Victoria decides she wants a gift. We learn about a book written by a cat and it’s whacko owner. Victoria proclaims that for her Birthday, she wants someone to go with her to see Kenny Loggins.

The Awesome portion of the show starts with things that are NOT awesome, like a video game based on rape. Victoria presents us with another Awesome List and this one goes to eleven total! We laugh that people at Victoria’s work have noticed her arm tattoo but don’t know about or follow Uncast.

We go through some more memories of Universary weekend and review a few movies we watched about dancing. There’s a vampire running for President of the United States and we also learn why Twilight vampires are so hard to kill. Victoria introduces us to what’s happening in tween culture today and it’s as facepalmy as you’d think. We enjoy some lunch and conversation with Victoria’s ever entertaining parents and we learn that Shaniqua is black.

Lastly, Rhian brings us some more whore news and we are there to witness her viewing her first full length porn movie ever…and it SUCKED. Pun intended. After a short bit on chat roulette, we finally end this bitch around 1:29:44. That’s nearly 90 minutes of entertainment (well, outside of the 2 minutes of Justin Beiber talk and music) so I think it’s justified that you call us at 619-940-4SEX right now. We don’t care what you talk about, just have something to say and say it.

170: Don’t Judge Me, Fuckers!

It’s Universary 3 beetches! The Return of The Return! We start this shit the way we do every Universary: Victoria drunk as hell and making all sorts of noise. As with our last episode, it starts with Kooza and bukkake, or as Allison calls it: When a mommy loves a daddy and a daddy and a daddy and a daddy… We’re doing this two guests at a time so no bukkake at this party. Butch worships at the alter of bukkake at church…which oddly turns out to be the Church of Awesome. Hmm interesting how that worked out. Aaron quickly offends Victoria by disparaging Victoria’s Canadian boyfriend, Michael Buble.

There’s some discussion about books the girls got off to as teens. We rehash the wireless headphones topic. We discuss favorite moments in the last year of Uncast and Victoria chastises Becky for her level of drunkedness. We discuss Malcolm Gladwell and geek holidays. Aaron reminds us who he would go gay for. Then he turns around and tries to disprove my gay/straight theory. Is it just a coincidence that Aaron deeply dislikes every celebrity Victoria lusts after in this episode? We’ll look into that one later. Aldo spanks Victoria so hard, a chair falls over and her ears fell off. Given that, she’s got an inexplicable fear of things that pop.

We move on to nipple piercing and the recovery time, Rhian’s amazingly beautiful toes, we all try to force alcohol down Neighbor Tony’s throat and we question labels for women of age who like to have sex with men of much younger age. New rule at Casa de Uncast: You can fuck on the couch but NO FUCKING THE COUCH! Victoria gets in a wrestling match with a helium balloon and loses. Aldo shows us his cocks and Daniel gets to stroke them. Victoria disappears from the show and comes back from the bedroom with missing underwear. We end the show after 1:23:42. Fuck us, we forgot to add the calls to the end of the show. We’ll have them in 171. Promise!

158: OMG I Was A Dyke!

Victoria starts off by ruining “New Moon” for everyone. We discuss the Lupilin Effect with IPAs and enjoy Avery’s Dugana IPA. There’s talk of JanuaRHI, maple syrup, some movies Victoria recently watched, vampires and Blake Lively. We learn about a man in Britain with bionic bowels. If the robots want to take over, they’ll have to start from our bottoms. We run through a Lightning Round of Food, Australians, the South African Economy and why beer is awesome. Victoria enjoys last.fm on her XBOX 360 now and we ask everyone which of these are sexy: monocles and/or fur hats? Naked pornstar in a ushanka and monocle? Fur hat and long wool socks?

Victoria starts a new band called Glocked and Loaded and we all roll our eyes. No judging though, we swear. Thanks to Butch and others, we learn that bacon sandwiches help cure hangovers. Daniel goes through his Sports News for the week and we wrap things up with an article from our Whorespondant, Rhian. Check her out with Big Jim on Audiobuzzed! Also props go out to our contributors this week. Go listen to I Love Lard and The Scream podcasts and check out Butch’s blogs at ButchRosser.net and TheIslandOfMisfitSongs.com. This episode for 86 minutes, 32 seconds.

The month isn’t over yet! DONATE to Movember for Daniel! Also we still want to hear from you all. Leave comments at uncast.net, email us at uncast.net@gmail.com or call us at (619) 940-4SEX

156: Hands On The Table

We have Rachel and Victor with us this week! Show starts off with some beers for the week and the drinks start flowing far before the recording making for a semi-chaotic output from all involved. There’s even a fuck break involved. For the audiophiles, our apologies.

Victoria’s parents take us out to dinner and we love it. We discuss their latest cruise and how much Victoria hates her mom’s fudge. Victoria starts asking me inappropriate questions about a co-worker and certain cold sex toys. Rachel breaks out the condoms and Victoria breaks out the Sexy Halloween Cocktails and Bacon Bake Sale. Some people at work cheat on contests just for a Wii prize and being a Scottish Brand Ambassador is NOT worth living in Houston for.

Victoria learned some things from podcasts since Daniel is unable to listen to them much anymore thanks to his job responsibilities. Apparently according to the news, Anglicans can now be part of the Catholic church. Who knew?! Why don’t people like to dress up for Halloween like back in the day? The girls grace us with an Awesome List and then we ask you all to share with us your favorite childhood books.

150: The Lightning Round

Butch joins us this week for the ever important show 150. We start off with a delicious beer, Daniel expresses his theory that everyone’s sexual orientation goes at least 2% the other way and we ask the important question: If you can’t wear white after Labor Day, when can you wear white again? Butch recommends some books for us to read as summer ends and we go through some of the things we did this Labor Day weekend including seeing the DaHonays and Marina at a campground in Mission Bay and our discovery of Sweet Tea Vodka. Victoria gets white trash on us and we all suck at Labor Day traditions.

Daniel presents us all with things he learned from podcasts this week, Butch tells us some stories in a new Lightning Round and of course there’s some sports news including the first Game of The Week for 2009. We think there are far too many sports with US Open tournaments: Soccer, Tennis, Golf, Surfing, Badminton, Snowboarding, Mountain Biking, Supercross and Cycling. After a few jokes and moments of clarity we add in some of our favorite musical discoveries of the summer, some charity work, some great places to enjoy a few drinks and you’ve got yourself a nice long episode without a single article being involved! We do however have just a few links for you. Enjoy tomorrow cause today’s schedule just filled up. One hour, 47 minutes, 37 seconds.

Autumn Reading
Angler The Cheney Vice Presidency by Barton Gellman
Outcasts United: A Refugee Team, an American Town by Warren St. John
The Art Of Making Money: The Story of a Master Counterfeiter by Jason Kersten
Love Will Tear Us Apart: A NOVEL by Sarah Rainone
The Battle For America 2008: The Story of an Extraordinary Election by Haynes Johnson and Dan Balz

Bands We Recommend
Hey Marseilles
Company of Thieves (Butch blog post link & Chris Cantore interview)
Metric
The Kills
Garfunkel and Oates
Silversun Pickups

Other Links For The Week
Bear Republic Brewing Company
The Island of Misfit Songs
Butch’s Blog

The Front Stoop
Holiday Matinee
Currant Restaurant
KFC’s death sammies with The Double Down & The Quadruple Down
Art event: Avedon exhibit
Charity event: Doctors Without Borders
Movie Reviews: Taking Woodstock and Julie & Julia

Got any thoughts, suggestions, comments, questions, complaints, or other greatness?
Write us at uncast.net@gmail.com or leave a comment on uncast.net OR
CALL US!! (619) 940-4SEX and leave any of the above or just a drunk dial, misdialed ramblings to your ex OR better yet…AUDIO PORN. Make love to our ears and we’ll love yours!

138: The Bookstore Is Incest

It’s all stage and screen this week. We talk about our viewing of a local production of Hedwig And The Angry Inch. There’s awards shows abound including the Tony’s and the MTV Movie Awards. Thank you Bret Michaels and Sasha Baren Cohen for making those shows memorable.

We try to help educate the public on the history of erotic asphyxiation tragedies, enjoy three movie reviews from Victoria, learn about stupid people in Eastern California and discover a site selling some very strange sex toys. Add in some redactions from Daniel and a great book for the summer. All this and more in just 63 minutes!

127: Cock Before Cancer

This week starts off with the revelation that Victoria is not Tori Amos. This leads into some American Idol talk. We discuss this Adam dude and the emotionally unstable cult that follows him. This of course leads into Victoria creating a religion that’s not a religion but more of Her Awesome Idea. The only real principles I paid attention to were: Beer is good, bacon is tasty and shirts off/tits out. Oh and of course we’ll start having meetings at Stone as soon as we can figure out what Her Awesome Idea is going to be.

We learn that Hippos are dangerous marblevores and we need more hippovores. Victoria runs through some backstory on 10 Dr Suess books while I discuss Objectum Sexuals on a semi-serious angle and why it scares me that some people take these disturbed individuals seriously. Remember when we first started talking about gay marriage and Christians asked, “what’s next? People will want to marry their TVs or pets.” Well, it’s starting and we need to stop it.

There’s a bit of a H.U.A.R. news as we learn robots now run on human blood and some microscopic ones fly. There’s some more Easter talk, Victoria loves KUSI and we give our book recommendation for the year: “Mr Darcy Takes a Wife” by Linda Berdoll. All this in 1:09:22.

124: I Ain’t Payin’ For Prayers

This episode is 4 x 31 flavors of fun! We start out innocently enough with a website that will allow you to pay for prayers to be said in your name. We go through 10 breweries you need to try in 2009 and while it’s not exactly our top 10 list, those on the list that we’ve had, we’ve liked for the most part and highly recommend.

Victoria brings us some job opportunities (eluded to briefly in 123), we learn that Alabama does in fact have a library, Britain is running out of Cocks and Bawls and we get an Awesome List from Victoria!

Then comes the real meat of the episode. I get serious for a bit and discuss a few things that just need to be said. Tune in and listen to find out what those things are! This episode is about an hour 45 long.

Links:
Pay For Prayers
10 U.S. Breweries to Try in 2009
Alabama has a library?
The U.K. is running out of Cocks
Mother Makes Her Kids Drink Meth Water

110: A Year Of The Hobo In Review

Here it is! Finally! Our year in review. Joining us via Skype is our good friend and co-host of Audiobuzzed, Rhian! We review various categories of the year and look back on the best movies, new TV shows, books, music and also events and those that made the year so great for us. Sit back and enjoy. This one is nearly two hours long so be prepared for a large file size!

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